Two years ago, I woke up to see my life shattered around me, I no longer had anything just the few people who stood by my side.
A domino effect struck my life and kept taking away everything that meant something to me until I believed in myself. I felt lost, I quit my job because I felt so helpless, my family dynamic changed, and I lost more than I ever believed I would.
For a long time, I allowed everything to consume me. I locked my bedroom door and let my sorrows drown me. It was to be expected, but at the time I never saw this whirlwind of emotions ending, for some reason everything I did would shatter around me.
My anxiety took over and so did my depression. Until one day my depression didn’t affect me anymore. I saw the brighter side.
Although my depression didn’t affect me like it once did, that didn’t mean I wouldn’t face other battles. The past few months have been ones I’ve kept pretty secretive. I remember I was someone who always felt motivated to get up in the morning and pursue whatever it is I wanted to do, but that fizzled out and I was left feeling lost.
I’ve always been a big dreamer and when I finally did try, people would put me down. It hurt, it knocked my confidence so much so that I was back to square one. Looking back and even now when people knock me, I don’t know why I let it affect me so much. It hurt, but I’m different and so is everyone else… “not everyone thinks the way you think, knows the things you know, believes the things you believe, nor acts the way you would act.”
I don’t know what came over me, but I no longer cared. I knew what I wanted to do, and that was all that mattered because for once my happiness was all that I cared about.
I’m nowhere near the finish line, I have a long way to go but finally, I see an ending to this hurt. I’m finally rebuilding my life no matter how small those steps are.
If you’re like me and you’ve felt lost, confused, one day you woke up and had nothing or you have a dream that people keep knocking.
Then know, that life’s too short and no matter what you do someones going to knock you down. It’s the getting up, and carrying on that makes you stronger, more powerful and able to finally free yourself from any hurt. Do what makes you happy and follow your dreams no matter how bizarre or impossible they may seem.
Never in a million years did I think I’d be back on the right track, but finally it’s getting somewhere, and if I can do it then you can too.
I also have a lot of you guys to thank. Sharing my journey has kept me going and without your response, I wouldn’t have found the strength to keep going. So I thank you all for helping me pursue my passion.
So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will,they become inevitable.