Mom.

Dear Mom, Happy mothers day. I wish there was something I could do to bring you back, each mothers day I sit here just praying to see you once more, pondering my thoughts, and reminiscing on all the memories we shared. This one has hit me differently though, not having you here with everything that's … Continue reading Mom.

Choosing me.

I hope that by writing this I can move forward with my life and begin to find true happiness within myself. Though that may sound cliché, I really hope that in time I begin to fulfil my true potential and become the person I aspire to be, physically, emotionally, and career-wise. I don’t know what … Continue reading Choosing me.

The future.

Recently I've been forced to ask myself one question, where is my life going? A month ago I knew who I was and what I wanted, but unfortunately life doesn't always go to plan and those plans you make can sometimes come crashing down, at least that's the truth for me. I've hidden myself away, … Continue reading The future.

Loneliness.

Loneliness, where do I begin? I have to admit that it often consumes me, for a while now especially. I know it's something a lot of us feel, ironically we're not alone, but deep inside there's that small part of you that can't help but feel it. It's sad because no one ever deserves to … Continue reading Loneliness.

You were never the enemy, I was.

I have neglected you for so long. Not in just one way, but in many. You keep me here and for that I should be grateful, but why are you so hard to love? From the age of 10, I abandoned you.  The words they told us weren't true. I'm sorry for believing them. I took my pain out on you, you didn't deserve those scars. No one does. I've hated everything about you, and you never turned your back on me. Every pill I swallowed, you fought … Continue reading You were never the enemy, I was.

Late night thoughts.

It's four in the morning as I write this because I can't chase away my thoughts tonight. I've tried so hard to ignore them, as I do most days, but pushing them away is only making them more difficult to run from. I feel lonely, I could be surrounded by nothing but people and still feel lonely. My heart breaks each time I think about myself. Each time I do, I feel an overwhelming sense of failure. I've failed myself. I had this passion, and I wanted to impact people's lives, but I feel like the most forgetful person in the world. I've never belonged, Even when I had friends I always felt like everyone had this hatred against me. I don't have many friends, in fact, I have none. I've always struggled to let people in, but for so long I felt like I didn't belong … Continue reading Late night thoughts.